Limitless

With a concept this cool it's hard to believe it was a complete and utter disappointment.

This movie was spineless and had NO CLOSURE!

Rating: Red
Score: 10% (Violence, Stupidity)

The Conspirator

This movie taught me that there is more to southern pride than refusing to relinquish slavery. Kind of sad that it took a movie for me to realize that.

Rating: Green
Score: 97% (important message and great acting)

Harry Potter 7 Part 2

A grand climax to the Harry Potter symphony. It was as good as I hoped it would be but inevitably shorter than I wished it could be.

Score:95%
Rating: Green

Unknown

This movie taught me that a car accident can completely change your nature; and in turn lead you down a path of repentance and reconciliation. Hooray for car wrecks!

Score: 70%
Rating: Yellow (violence)

Spiderman 3

I think it is called Spiderman 3 because it attempted to follow 3 villains at once which made for three underdeveloped bad guys and one super-dorky-spidey.

Score: 60%
Rating: Yellow (stupid)

Top Gun

PG?! Really?! A mild suggestion for parental guidance doesn't even go close to far enough. Also, it was so profoundly goofy I had to shut it off after the first hour. And I could only take so much of "Take My Breath Away". Maybe that just illustrates my lack of appreciation for the 80's.

Score: 40%
Rating: RED

The Adjustment Bureau

Pleasantly frustrating, Surprisingly profound, Unexpectedly romantic, and potentially spiritual.

Score:90%
Rating: Green

Cowboys and Aliens

I'm a little offended they didn't call this movie "Cowboys and Indians and Aliens." C'mon why do they always neglect the natives!?

Seriously though this movie kicks so much extra terrestrial keister. I want to see it again as soon as possible.

Score: 95%
Rating: Green!

Captain America

Despite this movie's failed attempt at making a villan more diabolical than Hitler, I thought it was a home run. Very heroic hero and very ugly bud guy

Score: 95%
Rating: Green

As Good as it Gets

This movie is like watching Seinfeld that is not funny, uses foul language, and has partial nudity. To me, that ruins it.


Score: 50%
Rating:  Red 

Thor

Two things came to mind while watching this movie:

Mario Kart's Rainbow Road course and "Man that guy is buff."

Score: 85%
Rating: Green

Cars 2

I was never infatuated with "Cars" because it felt too much like Jay Jay the jet plane. However it's one redeeming factor was it's appeal to kids. Ya know...vroom vroom talking cars...kids love it! Then Cars 2 decides it's going to add this mafia element to the mix and attach machine guns to hub caps. Now its "vroom vroom....blam blam blam....kabooom you're dead I killed you!"

Well Pixar...you killed your perfect streak. And I'm bummed about it.

Score: 65%
Rating: Yellow (a little violent for little kids)

Pirates of the Carribean: On Stranger Tides

I was so confused by this movie's lack of a good protagonist.

I was all like "Oh HE dies? That must mean he was the bad guy."

I also always feel the urge to take a shower after these pirate movies.

Score: 75%
Rating: Yellow

Million Dollar Baby

Am I glad I watched this movie?

Yes.

Do I wish I never saw this movie?

Yes.

Did I love this movie?

Yes.

Did I hate this movie?

Yes.

Score: 80%
Rating: Yellow (scar you for life)

The Recruit

Turns out movies with the letters : C I A F B and I all cause me immense stress.

Score 75%
Rating: Yellow (SX, L)

True Grit

The dialogue was gripping and entertaining, which is strange for a western, albeit the violence was a little bit over the top, which is strange for a western. It also could have ended 5 minutes sooner and I wouldn't have minded. Definitely a guy movie. 

Score: 79%

Rating: Yellow (V)

Cinderella Man

I am hyper-hyper-HYPER sensitive to people dying while playing organized sports. It FREAKS ME OUT. That's all I'm saying.

Score: 95%
Rating: Green

Preview: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DlbHzcH4VJY

X Men: First Class

I think I like prequels even more than sequels because it is like watching a movie while watching a movie you've already seen. Every few minutes you see or hear something that brings you back to the future in a joyous, fulfilling moment.  So, if you like the other X men movies, I'm certain you'll dig this one.

Score: 85%

Rating: Yellow (l,v)

Preview: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UrbHykKUfTM

I am Number 4

This movie was about as good as Number 2 if ya know what I mean.

Score: 40%
Rating: Red (st,v)

Preview: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g5djHG3hPu0

The Sum of all Fears

This movie is all like whoa! and then it's all like whaa? and then it's all like WHOA! and then it's all like WHAT THE?! and then it's all like....whew

It's also not completely unfathomable.

Score: 87%
Rating: Green (L)

Preview: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HJIF9-6D52w